What Are You Willing to Sacrifice to be Right?

What Are You Willing to Sacrifice to be Right?

Sometimes a title comes to me before I have any content to back it up, but this time the content  has been my bane for as long as I can remember.  I have a very logical brain.  I see black and white (b/w).  People that see gray drive me nuts.  I know that gray areas exist in most issues but my brain will work overtime to force them into a distinct category.  I envy the gray-seeing person.  You are the ones that are more forgiving, tolerant and generally nicer to be around.  You are the type of people that can be friends with anyone.  Although, we black and white thinkers tend to grate on your nerves a bit.  But if you are patient, you are even willing to concede that eventually we’ll come around to see things a bit differently.

We b/w thinkers are quick to make decisions.  We may even be first responders.  We see the problem and are quick to tackle it.  We save lives, companies, and leave no room for people to wonder what we’re thinking.  We also sacrifice relationships, make enemies, and are the first to be called intolerant.  Can you see where I’m going?  We each think we have the corner on ‘right’ thinking.  But each of us can be terribly wrong.

Sometimes even when we’re right we’re wrong.  As a b/w thinker if I’m stressed or caught off guard you gray-thinking people will push me over the edge and I will demand that you quit playing this game and see things the right(my) way.  In that moment I have forgotten the beauty of different perspectives.  I actually believe that being right is crucial in order for the earth to keep rotating around the sun.  To give in will cause the constants in the universe to unravel and we will all be cast into darkness.

Sound silly?  Well, yeah, now it does.  But some of you know what I’m talking about.  Now don’t get too cocky gray thinkers.  You’re the ones that get walked all over.  You tend to allow so many perspectives that you're not sure what you think yourself.  Yeah, you are often lovers of people, and that’s good, but sometimes….sometimes, you need to stand up to us b/w thinkers and flat out tell us that we’re wrong.  And that would be a more loving response than continually putting up with us and listening to our drivel.

I am impacted by two Bible passages: 

Romans 12:3, “Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgment, in accordance with the faith God has distributed to each of you.”  

Matthew 7:3-5, “Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye?  How can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when all the time there is a plank in your own eye?  You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye.”

So, two principles: 1) Think clearly about yourself and your way of thinking.  Understand that there are positives and negatives to every gift or talent.  2) Work harder on considering that you might be wrong but also be a friend by helping another see clearly as well.

It’s a lot to ask.  But as I sit here, I am momentarily estranged from the woman I love most in the world because my universe was thrown off kilter last night when she could not see my point of view.  Whether I was right or wrong matters little.  The issue will not rate up there with a cure for COVID-19.  Nor will I even remember it tomorrow.  

Maybe if we practiced the words of the apostle Paul, in Philippians 2:3, “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves.”  Would that be radical or what?  I’ll try it and let you know how it works out.